Art Addiction...

I never really thought of myself as having an addictive personality. In the past, I associated that trait with the lesser accepted addictions such as alcohol and drugs.  We tend to poo-poo these souls as weak, pathetic and out of control, when we ourselves have recurring behaviors than infiltrate our minds and bodies to the point of "addiction". Forget the endless list of minor disorders, tiny hang-ups and slight societal ills, is there such a thing as a "good" addiction? Is it socially okay to be obsessed with something?

My name is Laurel, and I am addicted to Polyvore. I started out with just a desire to find some cool fashions to  re-create on my sewing machine. I would just spend a few minutes perusing the items and picking a few things to add to my wish list. I wasn't spending any actual money, so how could it be harmful? Before long, I discovered the joy of the drag and drop lifestyle, and I became hooked. I could pull in artistic elements - backgrounds, florals, smudges, flourishes, etc. - making my fashion choices look even more trendy and cool. People "Liked" my sets and I started getting followers. I found myself scouring the web - Pinterest, Tumblr, everywhere - to find new elements for my sets.  My simple sets morphed into tiny works of art that had nothing to do with fashion at all. I confess that I have burned dinner once too often because I slipped back into the computer to work on a set and time got away with me, out of control, dragging and dropping the hours away. I am a Polyvore addict...I'm not proud of it, but at least I admit it.

They say that admitting your "problem" is the first step. But I say, there's another way to look at this. All of the great artists were obsessed with their creations, driven to leave a piece of themselves on a canvas or on a pile of clay or in the photography darkroom. To re-create the musings of our minds in some tangible medium is a gut-level reaction to the world around us. Whether we wile away the hours with "acceptable" hobbies like knitting, beading, teaching, cooking or gardening, there is a tortured artist in us all to some degree. The need to express ourselves is guttural reaction to life.

Don't bother trying to read anything into my art. I don't consider myself to be tortured, as in the artistic vein of a Toulouse-Lautrec,  Truman Capote, Johnny Cash or Vincent VanGogh, but I will be bound forever to create beauty in some way. It is part of me, the way God created me. So burned green beans withstanding, I will keep on dragging and dropping in Polyvore...at least until I grow tired of it. All artist are highly susceptible to boredom, you know.

Lost 2, by Laurel Dismukes - 2014

Laurel. Art addict.